Just a little more speed next time and they should make it.

Although not actually considered a big following in the world of Chevy Hardcore readers, we wanted to fill you guys in a little secret—going off-road can be a blast. Sure, most of us would rather have a great looking classic Chevrolet that we can take to a cruise night or car show, but what if you run into that instance where you need to leave the highway and travel onto parts unpaved.

What do you think would be your best choice of rental car for this vast, open area?

Before you decide to stop reading, give us a chance. This is not going to be about thrown-together death traps that frequent the local mud holes. No sir, we want to make this interesting. So what we are hoping to accomplish is give you an example of an off-road situation, and then give you some insight into what might be the right vehicle for that situation. So sit back, grab a cup of coffee, and prepare to be amazed.

For starters, any of the situations that we will be describing can be overcome by visiting one location, your local rental car agency—we’ll wait a few moments for you to wipe the coffee from your computer monitor…

You heard us correctly, the best off-road vehicle ever offered is a rental car. If you think we’re wrong, look at it this way; you don’t need to clean it when you get home, you don’t need to fix it if it breaks, and you don’t have to replace it if you crash—just be sure to get all of the insurance you can! 

On Safari

Although not many of us have ever had the opportunity to go on a real life safari, if you do, the correct rental vehicle needs to be chosen. For us, the Malibu seems like a good choice. We choose the Malibu, because it has four doors, which means you can carry a few of your buddies with you, it gets great gas mileage—not many fuel stations on safari, and if you do get stuck, it is small enough that you and your buddies can usually push it out of a bad situation. Not only that, but if while you’re pushing, a large, carnivorous animal happens by, since there are four of you, hopefully you’re not the slowest runner. While driving on safari, just be careful of stray Jaguars that might not be watching where they are going.

Okay ladies, dig in those heels!

Swamps of the South

Many of the southern states are known for things like great food, an eclectic lifestyle, and evidence-eradicating swamps. If you find yourself traveling in any of these exotic locales, the Chevrolet Camaro might be the right choice. Since the Camaro is available in convertible form, you can enjoy the sunny weather as you try to navigate through the muck and the mire. Sure, if you have the top down, mud will inevitably cover not just the outside of the car, but the inside will surely get covered in goo as well. But that’s okay, you have a rental, they will wash it—you did get the insurance, right? Besides, you will be the coolest guy in the swamp if you can get a couple of good-looking girls to help you get the car unstuck. 

Rock Climbing

When it comes to really getting into some off-road action, versatility is a must. Rock climbing is a very popular past time, and for this, may we suggest the Cruze. The Cruze is a compact and nimble vehicle that will get you into places that a larger car can’t. Let’s take for example the ability of it being easily removed from a high-centering situation. Its relatively small size combined with its power, means that it can usually get itself out of a high-center situation—if the initial speed is fast enough. If you do happen to not have sufficient speed to overcome a high-center situation, this nimble vehicle is light enough that you and your buddies should be able to give it a shove, and roll it out of the compromising situation. Being a front-wheel-driven car, if it does high center, just lift up on the back of the car, and transfer the weight to the front tires.

So there you have our choices of the best off-road vehicles available today. Now all you need to do, is go get the appropriate vehicle and head out for some some fun. But for the love of Pete, don’t forget the insurance!