Have you ever considered what car you would roll in when the Apocalypse arrives? Sure, there’s the obvious choices: off-road vehicles, motorcycles, tanks. Phooey!

Forget that noise. How about making a boring old Chevy pickup into the glorious Transformers-esque stunner it was always meant to be, loaded with lights and tricked-out metalwork?

If you’re teetering on the fence, maybe Orlando Figueroa’s crowning achievement can give you the kind of impetus you need. That’s because he’s a man of vision, taking his boring old 1981 C30 and customizing it to the extreme.

So just how in the world did such a monstrosity come to exist? In this video, Figueroa cites his inspiration from a dream: “…the world was full of zombies, and I was the only survivor. And the only way I was able to survive [was to enter] a vehicle, and this vehicle had superpowers. It could fly. It could throw lasers. The vehicle was my shield, it could protect me.”

Over the course of 13 years, the man assembled layer over layer of fiberglass and electrical wiring to make the C30 into a Transformer. Running two separate batteries and fuel tanks, the extreme pickup accordingly has added and multiplied various aspects over time, from its multiple TVs to its curb weight.

No word on whether this sweet overlord suit was included.

Whatever top speed this thing can achieve is powered by the relatively tame 350 under the hood. Engulfing it are a rebuilt Holley carb, two alternators, one for regular (whatever that may entail) use, and one entirely devoted to operating the gull wing doors and massive rear hatch, as well as four batteries to power everything from the mounted cameras to the amplifier for the–count ’em–TEN voice speakers.

A meager 46K miles have been accrued on the car, so it’s still got a ways to go before its chassis collapses in on itself. And in the spirit of full disclosure, Figueroa mentions that there is “some wear on the paint and a small leak from the AC.”

At the time of the eBay listing (number 121144033474), which ended back in July, the starting bid was set at whopping $250,000 with a reserve, and a Buy It Now price of $500,000. Is there a single soul out there who would pay even $250 for this thing?

Let us know in the comments. We’ll see what we can do to get that person help.

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